The end of my milky era

I'm sad to be writing this. It's been a long interesting journey to get to lactating. But I did it! I went from having some curiosity to finding a community and spending hundreds on pumps, supplements, and prescription pills to help me lactate. And it was worth every penny. 

I did this for me first and foremost. To prove to myself that I could. After struggling with breastfeeding when I had my son I wanted to prove to myself I could do better this time and this time it would be a positive stress free experience. And it was! It took months. From the very first drops of discharge to finally getting milk. Then to getting to that sweet vanilla milk. 

Lactating made me feel soooo feminine and sexy. It was like having a super power. It gave me something not all women have. It boosted my confidence and my sexuality. I loved the way men would flock to me. Sadly I never found that steady partner for nursing. Between that and the negative side effects like weight gain, irregular periods, mood swings and low sex drive it just seemed pointless. Who was all of this for? In the end it's just not worth it. I want to get myself back. 


While I sadly never found a regular guy to nurse I at least had the opportunity a few times. My very favorite was with my sweet Jonah. Words can't express how much I enjoyed the brief time we had together. He was everything I wanted in a nursing partner, I just loved how easily he fit in my lap. Sadly he never got any milk, it wouldn't come till after him. My most successful nursing experience was with my most recent boyfriend who was actually able to get a few drops of milk and he loved the taste. It was such a beautiful experience with him but bc of the angle we had to do it in I could never fully relax for fear of smothering and suffocating him with my breast. I was proud of the fact that he went from not being sure what to think about my lactating when we first met to craving my milk. I just wish we could have had more opportunities to nurse. 

 As sad as I am to close this chapter I also know its the right thing for me. I look fwd to getting my body back again. I take comfort in the fact that I did it once already. So if further down the line I decide I wanna do it again I already know how!

Thanks for coming along on this ride with me. I learned some things about myself. Even without lactation I think dry nursing is just as hot. Also, I realized just how important my breasts and nipples are to my pleasure. And how much attention they need and not to neglect that. I'd much rather  a guy worship my tits than go down on me. And I plan on keeping my breast pumps for my own pleasure. They're gonna become sex toys for me. 

In honor of me closing this chapter I figured I would share some of my fav pics from this journey. Enjoy!!