January 12th, 2024

I know its only january but I find myself seeing a lot of valentines day stuff. 

last year was so depressing. I was living with my ex but we were broken up. There's nothing more isolating than feeling alone with someone around. its heartbreaking. at least this year i can be my own valentine. 

ugh...side note, i got long nails for the first time and typing is hella fucking hard. lol. typos galore. it's really slowed me down. sexy but....not very functional.

anyhoo i won't get too down about valentines day. maybe next year i'll have someone who wants to spoil me.

i have completely stopped entertaining men online (yes again), i realized its just a waste of time and i have to listen to my gut. the kind of man i want isn't gonna be on reddit sending random messages to women. 

i think i'm ready for something real now. no more empty connections that feel transactional. it's been real guys, but the "ho phase" has ended. i'm ready for something real. but don't worry, i still have a dirty mind that i plan to share on here.

i'm no longer bitter though. i realize my problem was entertaining and giving my energy to ppl who don't deserve it. but that's over now. i've taken my power back and i'm smiling. and i hope to radiate positive energy to those around me. :)

anyway stay tuned for some spicy posts coning up bc ive been having spicy thoughts!