naughty naughty subby baby

Last night I was texting my with my tried and true. I have been pulling  back on sexual stuff with him and just in general. I haven't flirted with anyone in a while. But having a chance to re-connect made me feel better. Made me feel close to someone again. Then I guess I felt comfortable letting that wall down. I had been thinking about our sex. And how I never get tired of it and it always feels good. Mr. Big Cock never disappoints when it comes to his cock. The guy who helped me discover my size queen tendencies. Now, granted things had gotten a bit off balance with us, it became a little too much about his cock there for a while. And I started to feel like I was just there to fluff his ego and not to be seen as this sexual goddess of a woman that I am. But our last encounter went a long way to balance things out. Because it wasn't about his cock at all. It was all about me and my pleasure. And I enjoyed being in control. Something we will most definitely do again.

And we were flirting a bit over text. I initiated it. Then at night....I got in bed and laid on my side. My hanging tits smushed together and my nippes were right next to each other. This allowed me to graze against them with just one hang. And with every graze lightening bolts of pleasure shot up my spine. It's wild how something as simple as grazing your hand across my nipples can cause such intense pleasure. This pleasure began to build up and eventually flipped a switch in my head. I became absolutely feral. I wanted to be baaaaaaaaaaad. Very very bad. like....i have to watch what I say....type bad. I began to feel this intense urge to be used. Used like an object, like a receptacle. Milked like a cow. I felt like I was hypnotized and completely devoid of any thought that wasn't extremely taboo and sexual. I was in my subspace. Its such a fascinating thing to experience. Like, the fact that in every day life I want to be treated like a Queen and with respect and sweetness....but flip the switch and I want to be treated like an object and used for his pleasure. And what an intense desire, I was begging for it. 

When I'm in that space I see his cock like air i need to breathe. Its like my pacifier, and i want to suck it for comfort. And when he takes it away I whimper and gasp for it to be back in my mouth. When I'm in subspace I need his cum. I want him to pump it into every hole, cover my face, my body, my hair. Last night....in my trance....I told him...I need you to fill me up with your cum daddy. And he said the hottest thing...he said...

I want you to suck your pacifier first, then I'll make your pussy nice and creamy okay?

fuuuuuuuuuuuuck. the way he talked to me like I was a little girl but also instructing me to service him made my pussy gush. 

I told him I might already be carrying his baby. The thought of that normally would freak me out but in that moment...it seemed like the hottest thing ever. I just wanted to be an absolute whore. If he had instructed me to suck a strangers cock or let him fuck me, in that moment I would have. I'm telling you!!! subspace. it's WILD! I would have done anything he told me. [Luckily he knows my limits already]. 

I've roleplayed this fantasy before with someone else. Where he got off on whoring me out. And I got off on being used and also pleasing him. The fantasy is HOT. I think it would require some very serious aftercare though. Lots of praise, sweetness, cuddling, talking through it, etc. But it's a fun fantasy. And I trust him.